Tag Archives: humor

A Day In the Life of an Empowered Female Heroine

Beach, Gooseberry Point, WA. Photo by Scarlett Messenger
Beach, Gooseberry Point, WA. Photo by Scarlett Messenger

A Day In the Life of an Empowered Female Heroine

Funny satire on what it takes to be a a Female Hero in our culture.

She woke up like she did every day: slowly pulling her motorcycle helmet off, then shaking her head slowly back and forth to reveal a long, blonde ponytail. Everyone gasped. “That’s right,” she said, kicking the winning football goal before sliding into a sheer, sexy camisole under a blazer and playing as hard as she worked, “I’ve been a girl this whole time.” One of the guys, the real sexy one, shook his head in slow motion, as if to say “wh-wh-wh-whaaat?” You know the kind. His mouth was kind of open while he did it. He was totally blown away.