Scarred for Life

OMG! This is so traumatic, even for The Muppet Show. WHY? WHY? Why is Alan Arkin slaughtering bunny rabbits??

What does it say when you are in a room full of bird-headed mutants doing the hustle and YOU are the creepiest thing in the room?

It says volumes.

Uncle Deadly! Oh how I loved him as a kid. This creepy little Muppet is the blue guy with the quasi-Cthulhuesque chin tentacles (chin-tacles?) who would pop up every once in a while to make you soil your Pampers. So glad I found this!

Wow. This is like a serial killer’s love anthem. A man loves a monstrous thumb with hydroencephaly he has built from spare body parts, and then slowly dismembers it when it doesn’t love him back. Oh, and the hallucinatory ending ups the EW factor considerably.

I read this story a few years ago and it really wigged me out. As you’re reading it, it’s easy to think you might just remember something like this happening to you as well, buried deeply for all these years. But they never forgot you. They are watching, even when the tv is off, they are watching.

Muppets! The Muppets were on! I was exalted, elated. I wanted to wake my grandparents up, but I then started to feel a bit uncomfortable about what was happening on the television.
Muppets did not usually have fangs as I recall. At least, not ones that looked so … real and out of place in an otherwise standard Muppet-style mouth.