Apparently the difference in German between “you can pay the rent as you wish” and “you can pay the rent that way… YOU WISH!!!” is a misplaced carriage return.
Monthly Archives: February 2016
Personal Journal: Denglish
I have been trying very hard to work on my German before my trip. The unfortunate side effect of this is that my German isn’t getting any better, but my English is getting so much weirder. Twice today I literally used German syntax in English (“I want that shirt to buy”. Seriously. I actually said that) and just now I Germanized my verb and said “broughten” instead of “brought”. Now I sound stupid in TWO languages.
Personal Journal: You Must Pay the Rent…
Sigh.
Herr Funke: Have you filled out your paperwork yet?
Me: We need to discuss how I am paying you.
Herr Funke: I really need the signed lease form so I can hold the apartment. I need your paperwork.
Me: I just want to know how I am getting the money to you. The paperwork means nothing if I can’t actually pay you.
German Guy: SHOW ME YOUR PAPERS!!! I MUST HAVE YOUR PAPERS!!! NOTHING HAPPENS UNLESS YOU HAVE THE RIGHT PAPERS!!!
American Girl: BUT WE NEED TO TALK ABOUT THE MONEY!!! IF I THROW MONEY AT YOU I CAN GET WHAT I WANT!!! I HAVE THE MONEY!!!
Article: Fairy Tales Help Robots Learn Not to Commit Murder
Fairy Tales Help Robots Learn Not to Commit Murder
Given a choice, would Three Little Robots being chased by a big bad wolf A) build successively more wolf-resistant houses or B) kill the wolf with their nail gun? If you chose B), you’re probably a robot who hasn’t yet met Quixote, a learning system that teaches robots how not to kill by using fairy tales.
Personal Journal: Mietvertrag
Oh look. It’s my rental contract for the Berlin apartment. In German. A legally binding contract. In German. Written by Germans. Who invented bureaucracy. *slams head on keyboard*
PS, my address will be *********** 10119 Berlin Germany
Note: There is actually a “ventilation” clause in the agreement that states I am contractually obligated to air out the apartment regularly.