The second week didn’t go much better than the first. We had great difficulty getting our phones to work and found out we wouldn’t have internet for over a week. With no internet, not tv, no books, no music, and little else to entertain us, we tried to explore the city as much as possible, but I ended up with blisters so bad I actually wondered if I was going to have to seek medical intervention (people with MS have to be careful of such things, just like diabetics.) The week ended with me having a bit of a nervous breakdown and running away to Hamburg without telling my roommate where I was going. Not the most considerate thing, but the situation was complicated and at that moment he was part of the problem.
Sigh. They installed the Internet at the apartment… And of course it doesn’t work. Apparently, they install it and then another office has to switch it on, which could be at any point today. Or not. Because bureaucracy. Oh, Deutschland.
WE FINALLY HAVE REAL INTERNET!!!! OMG I am SO relieved. Now I can start work and enjoy myself. I know that seems backwards to most people, but my work really is everything to me, and the whole reason I am here.
Personal Journal: Ladybug, Ladybug
The Heritage of Berlin Street Art and Graffiti Scene
Elliott went to the store because I just don’t feel like going out today. I was taking a quick nap when the door buzzer rings. Thinking it was either Elliott or the landlord coming to fix the washer, I answer it.
Me: Hallo?
Woman: Hallo? Frau Funke? Bluh bluh bluh bluh bluh bluh Gesund bluh bluh bluh bluh
Me: *only understanding the word “health” in her entire speech* Es tut mir Leid, sprechen Sie English? (I’m sorry, do you speak English?)
*long pause*
Woman: Bluh bluh bluh bluh bluh bluh (note that she does not respond at all to my question, that I would have understood)
Me: *pushes buzzer in confused desperation*
Annnnnd…. no one came in. No idea what that was about. She sounded kind of angry, but then again…
I need to send postcards, but I don’t know where the post office is. I then realized that the last place on earth I want to go is the German post office. Bureaucracy, lines, and irritated Berliners in uniforms with government power? That literally sounds like hell. Elliott and I have decided that it would be like a scene out of Hellraiser or Event Horizon, where there would be blood on the walls, chains hanging from the ceiling, and the screams of the damned would meet you at the door as a man with an obscenely large grin on his face holds his own eyes in his outstretched hands and hisses a sinister “Herzlich Wilkommen…..” The only thing worse would be my vision of the German DMV, and that involves an office where roving rape gangs on Road Warrior style motorcycles chase you through the halls demanding papers you don’t have and didn’t even know existed.
Personal Journal: Lost and Found
Gallery: Volkspark am Weinbergsweg
I know my husband won’t mind me saying this, but DAYMN German guys are smoking hot. We just met one of our neighbors, Johannes. Yikes. I think he skews a little more toward Elliott’s end of the Kinsey scale, but still!
As starving students with a minimalist kitchen, Elliott and I have been cobbling together some interesting meals. Tonight, I accidentally invented Indian food by combining vegetables, lentils, pork, fett (it means fat, I don’t know what is in it) broth, soy sauce, paprika, sriracha, and ketchup over basmati rice. it was surprisingly good.
Ein kleines Haiku
von Scarlett MessengerMaschine ist tot
Keine saubere Kleidung
Warum Gott, warum?(Maschine is dead
No clean clothes
Why god, why?)
My laptop charger cable has now ceased to work. I have no fucking words at this point.
Computer only works when I keep a container of cold lentils on the power brick to cool it. We are pretty sure it’s the computer itself, as this is the second power supply it has killed in less than 3 weeks. My Wonderful Husband had to order me a new computer (Thank the gods for good credit), but it will take a week to reach him and then he has to ship it here. Sigh. I seriously can’t believe my luck. New washer won’t be here until next week, so we found a laundromat right around the corner next to the hostel. I saw it before but thought it was a hair salon. It’s freakin expensive as hell though, like $5 per load to wash. At this point, what I really want to do is curl up on the bathroom floor in a fetal position and cry, but that ain’t gonna happen. Meeting up with Ben tonight for… something? This is day 10, and so far everything has conspired against me being able to work. At least I have my phone working now, until it starts flying around the room cackling and trying to kill me Evil Dead style. Because you know that’s what’s next.
So after struggling to get my power supply to work for hours, and having a hysterical meltdown this morning, ending in my poor husband having to order me a new computer and figure out how to ship it to me in Germany…. it’s working fine again. The jar of medium sharp mustard sitting on it is warm and the thing appears to be functioning normally. I… I just don’t freakin’ know at this point. You know the second I tell him to cancel the order it will break again. If I don’t tell him to cancel the order, it will continue to work normally for the next 20 years. Is it possible for a person to have gremlins?
David, I am in your city. You made this place a gritty, urban fable for me in my youth, a Cold War concrete wonderland of decadence and deprivation. And even 40 years later it is still everything you music told me it would be and then some. I carry a little of you with me everywhere I go here. It seems only fitting. Thank you.
***
Uuuughhhh… You know what, Berlin? Fuck you and goodnight. The battle will recommence at dawn. Between the two of us I really don’t know who will win, but I am not going quietly, bitch.