Finally found Ben. He came over last night and took us for a beer up the street. We sat outside and enjoyed the spring evening and watched the people go by. As much as I am loath to admit it right now with all the trauma, we are all equally thrilled to be here, so it was nice to share our enthusiasm with someone. He looked at our washing machine and agreed it is probably broken. The landlord’s wife is coming this morning to meet the internet installer, so I will try and talk to her about it. They either need to fix it or replace it.

Ok, so they installed the internet… and it doesn’t work. It’s supposed to magically come on at some point today, but we don’t know when- or if.

Things I Have Learned About Germany in the Last Week:
1. Germany is efficient – NOT. Nothing works so far, and the bureaucracy is crippling. Technology is proving to be a huge hurdle for us.
2. Public transportation is great – YES. I love the U-Bahn. It goes everywhere. The trains go EVERYWHERE. All day, and in most places in Berlin all night. Zou are never more than a few meters away from a train, bus, tram, or other public transport.
3. Everyone speaks English – NO. They actually don’t. Many of them do. Younger people more than others. Don’t count on it in every situation. They don’t mind if you don’t speak German, but it is nice if you can try. You will manage.
4. Germans are rude/cold/unfriendly – Nah. They are actually very nice and sweet. They just don’t fake it. Don’t mistake directness for rudeness. Don’t think that someone calling you out on breaking the rules is them being mean. They are being helpful. There is actually a rare and personable warmth and kindness underneath all that.
5. Germans don’t jaywalk – Very rarely, and usually just the tourists and transplants. Don’t do it. Follow Ampelmann.
6. Germans are Nazis/racists – Don’t be a dick. That’s utter crap and they are sick of hearing about it. Unlike Americans who refuse to accept responsibility for slavery and the Native American genocide, they have come to terms with the sins of the past and are working to become a better people because of it. Yes, there are racists here, just like anywhere. But they certainly aren’t representative.
7. The fall of the wall was an awesome thing for everyone – Not really. Many East Germans felt that their culture and heritage was completely stripped from them after Reunification. They were a separate nation for over a generation. They had their own identity and traditions. This can be a sore point for some people. Keep your opinions on the matter to yourself.
8. Germans all wear The Scarf – Yes. Yes they do. There is definitely a Berlin Uniform: tight pants, sweater, scarf, hipster glasses. The Scarf thing isn’t just fashion. It’s freakin’ cold here.
9. Germans are all blonde/tall/thin – No, not by a long shot. In Berlin, people are diverse and varied. I will say most people seem pretty short. I am just under 5’6” and I feel like Gigantor much of the time. People are mostly on the thinner side, but walking is a big part of German culture, and Berlin is all about walking. There is certainly the usual big city Skinny & Tight Black Clothing aesthetic.
10. Germans are loud/ German is a harsh language – Yeah, in movies. Germans are actually really quiet by American standards. Not a lot of yelling or shouting on the street and they appreciate quiet mornings and Sundays. Berlin is a big city and things can be boisterous, but it isn’t obnoxious. And yes, German is “harsh”, but it is actually very lovely when spoken by someone who isn’t pretending to be Sgt. Schultz.